Sports Love & family

Learning Life's Lessons through Sports

Tag Archives: Parents


by 2 Comments

They’re Watching

Pretend you’re somewhere between 8-12 years old. Who do you look up to? Maybe a professional athlete or super hero? Now, picture yourself as a high school kid? You’re probably wrapped up in thoughts of yourself and what the new cool thing to do is.

Not all high schoolers are like that. Some are selfless and kind and are just great human beings. We are blessed to know a few of these kids. We mostly know them through baseball and other sports our kids play. These are the kids who come spend time with the 8-12 year olds. These are the kids that understand what its like to look up to older kids. They take the time to say hello or give a high five.

Yes, my kids idolize professional athletes, but they also look at high school athletes like they are celebrities too. If you’re a parent of a high schooler, remind your child that someone looks up to them. Remind them that their actions are not only being scrutinized by their peers but by those little ones that see them in the neighborhood or on the ballfield. Remind them that they too were young once and looked up to a high school kid. If just one high school kid can give a moment of their time to a younger kid, I think it could have a huge impact on the future. Making positive connections with others in life can be so important.

It’s one thing for us parents to teach our children life lessons, but it’s an absolute game changer if that life lesson is taught by an older kid.


by Leave a comment

Save the Drama for Someone Else’s Mama

WARNING! Rant ahead…

High school ended 20 years ago for me, however sometimes being involved in youth sports makes me feel like I’m right back there. I’m not talking about the “passion” that parents have when their kids are involved. I’m referring to the unnecessary “noise” that some parents partake in. In high school I never really understood it, but I knew teenagers were immature. In my adulthood, I have an even harder time grasping the concept. I don’t understand what has ever come of talking about people or situations to other people (the one’s not involved). It’s called gossip; the actual definition is casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people, typically involving details that are not confirmed as being true. This is constantly happening in the bleachers, in restaurants, on the streets, everywhere, and it needs to stop. What kind of example are we to our children by continuing this trend?

What’s got me so worked up?

I was recently approached by a parent whom wanted to confront me on rumors they had heard. While I appreciate being confronted so they could hear the truth, I’m saddened by this turn of events. I’m sad this person believed what they had been told. I can’t help the things people make up or say about other people, but I can control my own actions and be true to myself. I was also angry with those other people and the untrue messages they were putting out there. The messages were put out with the sole intent of creating drama. I try and steer clear of it, but on almost every team there’s one or two people who love the drama. If you’re one of these people, you need to stop. You need to find something better to do with your time other than gossiping about people you know.

How do we fix this?

It’s like bullying. We talk to our kids about how to handle bullies. Adults need to do the same thing. The way to quell this is to not participate in it. If you do get caught in it, seek out the truth (like this parent did) but let it end there.


by 1 Comment

5 Tips for Starting the New Season Right

For us mid-westerners the start of baseball season has just begun. For my family it’s the best time of year! No matter the season you are about to start or have just began we compiled this list to help you start this season on the right track (see this post for items you’ll need).

  1. Get Organized! I just spent a half hour putting all my kids games into an excel spreadsheet so that I can see how many games we have on any given day. I have three kids, so I get three schedules, this is a way for me to see all of them in one.  Typically, once the spreadsheet is made, the games get entered into the kids shared calendar, which is shared with the kids and grandparents.
  2. Organize the Uni’s! I spent time this weekend putting together everyone’s uniforms in the designated uniform bag in the laundry room. I suggest doing this so there’s no question of “Where’s my ____?” It doesn’t alleviate all of our problems, but everyone knows after I wash uniforms where they should be. For instance, for this baseball season each boy needs, pants, jersey, socks, stirrups, belt and hat. That’s a lot of items to keep track of! Designating a space for them to be helps when crunched for time.img_5230.jpg
  3. Start Meal Preps! Meal prepping for the week is key. I sit down on Sunday’s and make out a schedule of meals for the week. If I have time, I grocery shop for only those items, if not, I sometimes have our groceries delivered (best thing for working moms!) Planning meals for the week keeps us on budget and healthier. It’s hard to do, but I’m always glad I did! I also depend on meals prepared in my Instant Pot LUX60V3 V3 6 Qt 6-in-1 Muti-Use Programmable Pressure Cooker, Slow Cooker, Rice Cooker, Sauté, Steamer, and Warmer, check it out if you haven’t already! Sometimes if we’re lazy we’ll make a lot of one meal and eat it for two meals! One year heading into baseball season I had a freezer meal party. It was fun and super helpful having a week’s worth of food prepared already!FreezerMeals
  4. Make Introductions. I’m a people-person, so for me, the beginning of a new season means meeting new people. Even if you’re not a people-person, I think it’s important to introduce yourself to the coaching staff and the parents of other players. Some of the greatest friendships we’ve made have come from the sports our children play. I’m not saying you have to be best friends with everyone, but knowing what parent belongs to what player just makes sense. If you’re a Team Manager or Team Parent, arrange a get together before the season. It’s always nice to meet or hang out with other parents when you’re not trying to get the best bleacher seat. Also, make a roster with kids’ names and numbers for parents, this way everyone learns the kids names easily.
  5. Remember to Enjoy it! I know when you’re running each kid here and there and when there’s not enough time to catch your breath the last thing you want to do is be grateful for this time. But, please remember to take a moment and be thankful. This phase of life is brief, so we need to stop and enjoy it. We also need to be grateful that our children have the ability to do all their activities! I know I’m not sure what my life will be like when I don’t have my kids’ sports to attend 😦

I hope this list helps you get a good jump on the new season ahead! We’d love to hear from you and how you prepare for the next sports season, leave us a comment below.


by Leave a comment

Soak Up the Down Time

We believe in having our kids play as many sports as possible for as long as possible. Each of our kids play multiple sports. We’ve been told playing three sports in high school is virtually impossible, so we’re encouraging them to be multi-sport athletes now. Not only are there health benefits to this, but there’s a special time in between, it’s that precious time off during the transition from one sport to another.

Let’s face it, we schedule and overschedule our children. They are constantly on the go. So, when it comes time to transition from one sport to another we typically get 1-2 weeks off. For our family those weeks are precious…but they are also a curse!

Our kids need time to be just kids. To play outside with friends and even to play some video games. But, too much time in our household isn’t a good thing either! More time together also means more arguing! I guess that’s part of growing up too!

So, why is this a blog post? Well, transitions are part of life, and learning about life through sports is what we’re all about. I wanted to bring attention to this special time because as a family we feel it’s an important time. While each kid can learn valuable lessons on the field or court, the entire family can learn about life in the transition time.

We all know life flies by, so when we have these moments of pause, we need to do just that. Stop running from place to place. Put down our devices. These transitions are built into our lives so that we can take that time to recharge. We can take this time to reconnect with each other. We can take the time to appreciate all that we have.

So, if you’re like our family and have a hard time with the downtime during a transition, try to embrace it. Enjoy watching your kids play with their friends. Sit back as the arguments begin and then be grateful for the devices as they provide peace for everyone after. Embrace some quality family time or one on one time. And remember, these moments of good and bad won’t last forever so make the most of these times!


by 2 Comments

Book Review: What Made Maddy Run

When I was told I need to read this book I wasn’t too sure what it was about. I was told that it was about the pressure put on kids in sports, so, of course I was interested. But, the book was so much more than that.

I’m not going to lie, it was difficult to get through. Maybe it’s just me, but I have trouble reading non fiction books. I read to escape everyday life, so reading about something real is difficult. Reading about something that hits home is doubly difficult! Let me give you a little background.

Maddy was an all American girl that appeared on the surface to have it all. I say it appears to be that way because we can’t deny she had mental health issues. I think the misconception with mental health is that people don’t realize it can happen at any time in your life. For years, Maddy seemed to have it all. She was beautiful, got good grades and was a tremendous athlete. Towards the end of her high school career she was being sought after by numerous colleges for soccer and track. Every athletes dream and hers as well.

Ultimately, Maddy chose to run track at the University of Pennsylvania. The book focuses a lot on the fact that Maddy wasn’t sure if this was the right decision. She was debating this choice or going to LeHigh for soccer. The book makes you think that these choices could have potentially impacted the outcome. I’m going to tell you, either choice would’ve ended the same. Maddy was the type of kid that needed and longed for perfection. She needed to be the perfect student, the perfect athlete and the perfect friend. She was so consumed with this ideal of perfection that she didn’t live in reality.

Another theme throughout the book was Maddy’s social media accounts and in general teenager’s use of them and not being able to separate screen life and real life. If your mental health is questionable the lines between the two are very blurry. Even if your mental health is in check, those lines can still be blurry. I talk to my kids all the time about surface-level friendship. Most of social media is that way. You truly don’t know the person behind the pictures. It is so important to have deeper relationships with people. So, that if there’s an issue, they’ll know and they can try to help you. I’m not saying that Maddy’s friends could’ve helped her, but I do know they didn’t think things were that bad. A lot of the onus lives with Maddy on that one. She was really good at keeping things from those closest to her…and that’s the truly scary part.

To wrap up, here are my thoughts and I’d love to hear from you if you read this book. Somehow we need to change the conversation about perfection. It’s absolutely unattainable and whether you or someone else puts that pressure on you to be that way, its wrong and needs to change. As parents, this conversation begins with us at home. This book has helped me with the conversations I’ll have with my kids moving forward.

If you’re interested in reading the book click the image below.
 (affil)


by Leave a comment

Winning isn’t Everything

I have three kids that play sports, so inevitably I can’t always be at every game. Though, this kills me, its virtually impossible to be everywhere. So, after a game I wasn’t at, I usually ask the kids how it went.

Our first instinct is to ask “Did you win?” As parents we need to reset this expectation. Asking an innocent question like that puts too much emphasis on the wins and losses. We need to remember what the goal is, player development, learning the sport and having fun. Asking more specific questions such as “What did you learn today?” “Did you work on [fill in skill here] today?” Or even asking more vague questions like “Did you work hard today?” “How did it go today?” “Did you have fun?” can change the expectation that winning is all we care about.

If we change the way we have the conversation then we’ll start changing the expectation. Learning life’s lessons through sports doesn’t always have to be through wins and losses.


by Leave a comment

I Can’t Stand Pouters…

I can’t stand pouters. There is nothing that eerks me more. And unfortunately, I am raising at least two pouters (jury is still out on number 3). Don’t get me wrong, I have three good kids. They are kind, they are good friends and they are most always polite. Those are qualities I am so proud they have.

First, let me say my kids are not mean-spirited and never do anything with ill will toward anyone. That’s not who they are. They are competitive little beings. Like, competitive to a fault. For instance, this basketball season our oldest was on a losing team (I wrote about it here). We saw the disappointment written all over his face when the team started getting down by 5, 10, or even more. His body language and attitude shifted…and not for the better. What we would’ve like to see and what we preached to him after the game was to take that frustration and play harder. The only game you can control is yours, and you are only 1/5 of the team on the floor. We always said these things in the end, but they fell on deaf ears.

On the other hand, my daughter was on a winning team and she herself was having much success on the court. But, still, many games we had to talk to her about her body language and attitude. She was always disappointed in her play or she always picked one negative thing that happened to her and focused on that. No matter how much we told her she did great or that we were proud of her.

I tell you this, because we are not perfect parents, even though we try to preach about raising kids in this sports life we live. We are trying and doing the best we can. However, there are just somethings we can’t contend with, and one of them is DNA. You see, competitiveness runs strong in our family’s blood (Todd and I compete with each other constantly). And while it’s a great attribute, many of us have a hard time channeling it in a positive way.

We are constantly preaching to our children, if something’s not going your way on the field or court, use that energy in a positive way. Cheer on your teammates, pick each other up, play harder. Many kids, mine included have trouble breaking out of that mental slump. It’s hard when you’re a competitor and you’re losing or the game isn’t going the way you want it to, to use that negative and make it positive energy. I know a lot of adults who can’t do that let alone young athletes.

You can rest assured that Todd and I will continue to work on this with our children and if we come up with some great way that we somehow got through to our kids, we’ll share it here first. And, if someone out there has figured this out with their kids already, please share with us because inquiring minds want to know!


by 1 Comment

Ask Yourself, Can You Commit?

So your kid wants to try out for the [insert sport here] travel team? Is your family ready for the commitment? Do you have what it takes? Does your kid have what it takes? This is something at Sports, Love & Family we feel very strongly about. It’s one of the strongest life lessons we’re teaching our kids.

Before you jump on the travel team band wagon there are some things you should ask yourself and your child. First, are you as a parent ready for this commitment? If you are not willing to drive your child all over the county for practices or games…you are not ready. If your social calendar is booked every weekend…you are not ready. If you don’t enjoy spending hours watching sporting events…you are not ready. If you purchased a vehicle based on seating availabilty and trunk capacity…you are ready. If you seek out sport events even if you don’t know any players…you are ready. If you are not ready for this type of commitment then there’s no point of asking your child if they’re ready. It begins with you. If you can’t give it your all, then don’t bother. The goal is to be an example to your child and if you can’t fully commit, then don’t do it.

Once you know you can commit, now you need to discuss what the commitment looks like with your child. Make sure you’re being honest with your child when you talk to them. Let them know how often practices are, how long and far away game days may be. Let them know how long the season is and if it interferes with other sports or activities they like to do. Because, parents, let’s face it, this is their first commitment they will make and how you handle this sets the stage for later in life.

At Sports, Love & Family we are fully committed.


by Leave a comment

Sports Vacations, Pick #2: Baltimore, MD

So, we love sports. But, we really love baseball. Todd and I fantasize about our retirement and traveling the country going to major league baseball stadiums. We are a baseball family. Our number two vacation pick is Baltimore, Maryland. What is better than the birthplace of George Herman “Babe” Ruth Jr? To a baseball family, not much!

Again, it was easy to get there, about a five and half hour drive. We stayed in Downtown Baltimore, not far from the Inner Harbor. We loved walking around the harbor area and of course, we visited the National Aquarium while there. Definitely a must see while in Baltimore. After we exhausted ourselves with walking around the harbor we went to rest.

The next morning was our tour of Oriole Park at Camden Yards. I’m a firm believer that your tour guide makes or breaks your tour. Just like at Louisville Slugger, our tour guide at Camden Yards was phenomenal. He was a retired teacher and clearly loves baseball history. Even if you’re not a baseball fan the history of Camden Yards is impressive. It’s so cool how the frontage is the old B&O Train warehouse (yes, the monopoly one), now office space (could you imagine working there?). Each component of Camden Yards was designed with other stadiums in mind, essentially they took the best parts of cool stadiums and put them into the new stadium.

One of my favorite parts of the stadium is the plaque baseballs in the ground, or on the wall of the warehouse for the farthest hit homeruns (there’s only one on the wall and it belongs to Ken Griffey, Jr.) It was fun trying to find our beloved Indians players. There’s a nice space past the outfield with player statues, just like at Progressive Field. If you’re a fan of Babe Ruth, Baltimore is the place for you. Our guide told us all about The Babe’s life. It was cool to look out past the city and see the boy’s home that he stayed in and a few blocks over was his home and now the Babe Ruth Museum. Where second base now sits was the bar that his parents owned. His mother didn’t want The Babe born above the bar, so she moved in with her in-laws a few blocks away (the museum site).

After the tour we walked around the stadium and to the Babe Ruth museum. The whole walk over was fun because they have baseballs guiding you. We didn’t take the tour of the museum, but we walked in the store. I definitely think I’d like to go back and do the tour.

When we got back to our car we grabbed a bite to eat and headed to Washington, DC. And if you learned anything about our family, sports (especially baseball) was involved in that adventure too! Stay tuned…


by 1 Comment

Life Lesson: Persevering through Adversity

What do you do when faced with adversity? Do you back down and give up or do you push yourself to the limit? Many of us learned this lesson on a ball field or court early on. The way we reacted to a challenging situation then, may not be the way we’d handle it now. However, being a parent allows us to use the insight we gained at those times with our children today.

Our daughter’s basketball team was playing another team they’ve played four times in the last two weekends. After that many games in a short time you learn a lot about the other team and each player. Our daughter ended up defending the same girl in each game. After the first game it became apparent she was an aggressive and “dirty” player. Last weekend she handled her very well. We were very proud of how she worked through that challenge and persevered.

However, after playing this team four times our girl was pushed to her limit. The fourth game was different. The other girl was more aggressive and dirty. She was actually being told to behave that way from her parents in the stands. Clearly, her mom and dad haven’t read our fan behavior post. At the beginning it looked like our child was getting the best of the other girl. I was proud in that moment, because I felt like she was pushing through everything this girl was trying to throw at her. But, as the game went on the physicality of it got worse. She hadn’t dealt with that before. I could see the frustration begin to build on her face.

After the game we walked over to tell her how proud we were of her. We let her know that she played the game the right way. It didn’t matter, the tears began to flow and she didn’t want to hear anything we said. She didn’t care that we were praising her, she felt like she didn’t handle it well. Her frustration was at an all time high. Her and I walked down the hall to the bathroom, all the while I was saying all the right things (in my mind).

After a few minutes in the bathroom of me trying to talk to her, I realized it was a lost cause in this moment. She was running on adrenaline and emotion. I tried to compete with that by using all the things I’ve learned from every sports article I’ve ever read.

We both learned something in that bathroom that night. I know that in those few minutes after the toughest game she’s played thus far she wasn’t hearing me talk about persevering through adversity and being pushed to your limit, but she did store it away in her mind. I also realized that I need to let her have space after a game. It’s ok for her to be emotional, all of the emotions, good and bad. I can talk to her about the life lesson she just learned first hand…but next time I’ll wait a bit.

This day was not about us helping our daughter in that moment, it was about giving her space so she could figure out how to work through the situation in her own time and way. On this day, WE learned a life lesson through sports.